Hard Time

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It must be hard being two years of age. Confusion reigns. You know what you want, but you don’t know what you want and you don’t know how to say what you think you might want.

I’m finding this with my eldest daughter who turned two a couple of months back. We have had an awful lot of tears lately, borne out of her confusing frustration.

Yesterday she cried because she wanted her water bottle. So i gave it to her. She cried when she took it and then threw it on the floor. She then cried because she wanted her water bottle back. Clearly I couldn’t win.

We have this with shoes, coats, toys, food, bath time. Most things actually. The only way to snap her out of it is by the power of distraction.

Have you seen the children’s film UP?,  where Dug the Golden Retriever can be distracted mid sentence by a ‘squirrel’. Well its like that with Belle.

Mid water bottle throwing rant i shout, look there’s a (fake imaginary) rabbit/dog/balloon/ball. I am fast becoming the Queen of distraction. Even my 8 month old has bought into it and started craning her neck trying to see what it is we are meant to be looking for.

We are also having problems at night time where before there were none. She cries out for Mamma 1-4 times a night usually on the pretence of having lost her comfort blanket. It’s most often right beside her. As soon as I go to her and are in her room, stroke her brow, she’s quietens down and goes back to sleep.

Clearly its reassurance she needs so for now i am loathe to let her cry it out in the hope she settles herself.

The other week she woke five times in one night and kept saying ‘mamma, man’ and was pointing at the wall. After the second time of this happening, she started to scare me but i tried desperately to not show it. For a moment I was worried she could see dead people.

Clearly being two comes with a whole new level of maturity. Her brain is slowly shaping and making sense of the world around her and as she is not able to communicate as effectively as either of us would like, life for us is still very much like a game of Charades in this house.

I would love to tell her that it gets better, the frustration that is. Of course it does in the short term but then another age appropriate hurdle life will throw her to overcome. What I really need to teach her (and remind myself) is that the only constant in life is change.

If she can find peace and acceptance in that, her life will be a breeze.

For now, we’ll no doubt continue to have tantrums because I wont let her wear shoes that are two sizes too small and try to explain why she cant have biscuits instead of the sandwich i made her for lunch (its a valid question i think to myself) or why she cant wear her swimsuit to the shops when the weather is barely above double digits. I really try to say Yes to as many of her requests each day as possible whilst walking the tightrope of not spoiling and indulging her too much. Its a tricky balancing act and only hindsight will tell whether I get it right.  I just don’t want to wind up being the one who constantly tells her no and giving her a hard time, there is plenty of time for life to do that to her.

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