I haven’t posted a blog for a number of weeks, it was my intention to deliberately bypass the month that was October.
There were a succession of low points that came thick and fast. There were back to back illnesses, breakages, breakdowns (of the machinery kind), leaks, bruises and cuts amongst other things all contributing to the haemorrhaging of my bank account and all sustained by the paradigm otherwise known as bad luck. It happens. Admittedly whilst no one died, that i know of, it was still a difficult & expensive month to weather.
For the past few years October has and remains our Mensis Horribilis. It seems to be the four weeks of the year when the Universe challenges our physical & mental dexterity & our resolve. I’ve come to dread the turning of the calendar to unveil 1st October, so as to mean only one thing for our house. Bad luck.
I really do try to post when i have only nice things to say. There is far too much negativity in this world already without me writing an open letter to the universe full of my ranting and imagined slights. Remembering that old adage if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all. It worked for Ronan (Keating) and as far as I’m concerned is good solid advice and rather telling as to the reasons behind my blogging silence. Positive happy thoughts were few and far between.
For if what the psychologist Carl Jung was alleged to have said ‘the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light of meaning in the darkness of….? Of what exactly I’m not sure but to find some meaning in the bad things and to express only good is what i take from him to mean.
And there was something nice that happened last month and that was our holiday to the Greek island of Crete with friends, a silver lining if you will. Whilst our lives remained ever the same, with the same daily pressures, under the Grecian sun and in a different setting it enabled us to see how tired we were being parents to two young girls, running our own business and juggling everything else in between. It acted as a great opportunity to remind ourselves to pull in the same direction. Too easily you forget and lately, too often for us.
It was good to get away, but great to get home sporting golden sun drenched skin and wearing a refreshed perspective. It breathed new life into our psyche. We shouldn’t have left it so long getting away and undervaluing the benefits of a holiday and whilst going away isn’t always possible or the answer, we recognised the time had come in our lives to carve a little something out for us, away from the girls and everyday. Acting on our impulse, we booked a babysitter. A wonderful local child minder who i met through a baby music class and we have our first ‘date night’ in the diary for this weekend. Dinner at a local restaurant we both wanted to try. Every few weeks it is our intention to go out for a few hours on our own to get a little distance from our every day and talk and laugh and remember to just be us.
I’ve also made a list of the things i want to try to achieve, reading more is one of them and another is to forge ahead and finish my latest writing project. It seems to just be languishing on my notepad. It’s a departure from my usual attempts but i really think this one might have legs. We’ll see.
So out of the darkness that was October, November has ushered itself in and so far is building promise and positivity. Maybe a change is as good as rest.